How your no, can be a big YES!

How your no, can be a big YES!

I once broke up with a boyfriend
While I was in the other room trying to catch some sleep
I heard him cry
Not the kind of superficial crying, but deep deep crying of his inner child

It brought my heart to tears as well
Feeling his pain
Having the belief to have caused this pain as well

My first reaction was to go to him
To hug him
Tell him everything would be alright
But I did not

My inner voice was very clear at that moment
I could even “hear” it
“Let him be”
So I did not go and dealt with my own discomfort

Years later this ex boyfriend and myself met
And he told me that leaving him at that moment in his life
was very hard on him, but also one of the best things that
had happened to him

For it had made him grow
Find himself and in time another love
To whom he is married now and with whom he has kids

Why I am sharing this
Because this and other events in my life
taught me that sometimes saying no to someone or something
may feel like harsh or even selfish
But it may be a big YES to their (and so your) being

It may awaken feelings or emotions
bring them to surface
That were still asleep until then
Now ready to be hold, loved and embraced

For you to come more alive
Love is not the same as being nice or sweet
It means being true to your self
And by doing so being true to the other(s)

I see you

I see you

My surrender

My surrender

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